Do you struggle with practicing mindfulness as part of DBT? Or do you struggle with practicing mindfulness simply? If so, this guide is for you.
I will discuss how we can use the ‘How Skills’ to be more effective in our mindfulness practice and give you seven ways to do so.
They are:
- Eating
- Watching Nature
- Holding Your Breath
- Listening to Music
- Taking a Bath
- Looking at Social Media
- Gardening
I’ve practised this skill numerous times as part of my skills training, and I have to say it is easily one of the most important skills you’ll use in dialectical behaviour therapy.
I’ll show you exactly how to practice the dbt how skills and improve your mindfulness skills simultaneously. Lets take a moment first to understand each skill and the need for it.
Table of Contents
What Are the DBT How Skills?
In case you don’t know – the How Skill is a part of the mindfulness skills included in DBT skills training (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy).
It’s broken into three parts to help you understand HOW to practice mindfulness effectively: Non-Judgmentally, One Mindfully, and Effectively.
These all assist in effective and healthy mindfulness practice and are part of core mindfulness skills and dbt techniques.
What is Non-Judgmentally?
Non-Judgmentally: When we actively take a non-judgmental stance on our thoughts, emotions, and feelings and don’t assign labels or evaluations to them. It helps us view all thoughts as equal and encourages us not to expect perfection. Instead, we become willing to foster understanding and compassion for ourselves and others.
Being nonjudgmental helps us accept our everyday lives and improve our emotional regulation by allowing us to see our mental health and the world around us with fresh eyes.
It challenges our automatic response of evaluating and assessing everything, which, while useful for navigation, often results in a negative environment filled with shame, sadness, and guilt.
We give ourselves the chance to perceive our thoughts, the actions of others, and our surroundings from a perspective unclouded by our biases and preconceptions.
This results in less intense emotions and volatile reactions and better awareness of ourselves and others’ feelings.
Letting go of judgments is important.
It lets you fully immerse yourself in life without labelling, assessing, or getting stuck on how you should feel or what you should be doing.
Here’s a video that explains this nicely:
What is One-Mindfully?
One-Mindfully: When we do one thing at a time. Nothing more, nothing less. We are anchored to the present moment.
You fully immerse yourself in what you’re doing and don’t divide your attention by doing anything else.
Whether eating, working, or conversing with a friend, one mindfully encourages you to give complete attention to that activity.
This approach helps counteract tendencies to dwell on the past, worry about the future, or get caught up in negative moods and anxieties.
Engaging in tasks with complete attention strengthens your ability to concentrate and remain present, which is essential for absorbing and applying DBT skills effectively.
Take a look at this video for a good description:
What is Effectively?
Effectively: When we do what works best in any given situation rather than getting entangled in who (or what) is right or wrong. Being effective is regularly allowing yourself to let go of the need to feel right. Said another way, we let go of the desire to be right and instead do what works based on our DBT skills.
Acting effectively is often associated with our ability to radically accept a situation.
Being happy with an unpleasant situation or person isn’t necessary.
Probably, it’s better and more effective just to let it go – you radically accept the situation as it is – that is being effective in action.
Accepting the situation doesn’t mean condoning it—you’re just not giving yourself more work by fighting something that cannot be changed.
Okay, now that we’ve covered what the how skills are, let’s look at ways to use them to practice mindfulness.
The 7 Best Ways to Use DBT How Skills to Practice Mindfulness
I’ve broken these down into the three dbt how skills – non judgmental, one mindfully, and effectively. We’ll practice them by channeling our focus into an activity as that’s an effective (wink wink) way of doing it!
1. Eating
Non-Judgmental: Eat without labelling foods as “good” or “bad” or criticizing yourself for your food choices. Appreciate the variety of flavors and textures as they are.
One-Mindful: Give your full attention to the act of eating. Savour each bite, noticing the smells, tastes, and sensations, and resist the urge to eat while distracted (e.g., watching TV).
Effective: Select foods that nourish your body and satisfy your hunger, considering enjoyment and nutritional value. Plan your meals to support your overall well-being.
2. Watching Nature
Non-Judgmental: Observe the natural world around you without assigning judgments to what you see. Appreciate the beauty and imperfections equally.
One-Mindful: Be fully present in the experience of watching nature. Whether observing a sunset or watching birds, immerse yourself completely in the moment.
Effective: Engage with nature in ways that rejuvenate you. Choose settings or times that enhance your connection to the natural world and your sense of peace.
3. Holding your Breath
Non-Judgmental: Approach this exercise without assessing your capacity or comparing it to others. Accept your breath-holding ability as it is now, recognizing that it can vary daily.
One-Mindful: Concentrate solely on the experience of holding your breath. Notice the initial comfort, the growing urge to breathe, and the sensations in your body, keeping your mind focused on this singular experience.
Effective: Use breath-holding exercises to enhance your mindfulness and stress management skills.
4. Listening to Music
Nonjudgmental: Listen to music without categorising it or judging your taste. Allow yourself to experience the music fully, whether it’s a genre you’re unfamiliar with or a song you’ve heard a thousand times. I find it helpful to close your eyes.
One-Mindful: Immerse yourself in the act of listening. Pay attention to each instrument, note, and lyric, experiencing the music with your whole being without distraction.
Effective: Choose music that resonates with your current or desired mood. Listening to music mindfully can be a powerful way to enhance your mood, relax your mind, or energize your body.
5. Taking a bath
Non-Judgmental: Experience the act of bathing without evaluating your body or the experience. Accept and appreciate the moment for its soothing qualities.
One-Mindful: Immerse yourself fully in the sensations of bathing—the warmth of the water, the scent of soap, the feeling of relaxation.
Effective: Turn bathing into a self-care ritual that cleanses the body and soothes the mind. Choose bath products and settings that enhance this calming experience.
6. Looking at Social Media
Non-Judgmental: Engage with social media content without passing judgment on yourself or others. Recognize the tendency to compare and critique and consciously observe content with openness and curiosity.
One-Mindful: Focus on one post, image, or video at a time. Resist the urge to scroll mindlessly. Give your attention to what you’re viewing, allowing yourself to be fully present with the content.
Effective: Use social media purposefully, selecting content that uplifts, educates, or connects you with others meaningfully. Set boundaries to ensure your social media use supports your mental health and well-being.
Put your DBT how skills into action with this one – it’ll be challenging!
7. Gardening
Non-Judgmental: Observe the gardening process without labelling it as tedious or rewarding or judging your gardening skills. Accept the moment, whether pulling weeds or admiring the blooms, without attaching value judgments to the tasks or outcomes.
One-Mindful: Focus solely on the gardening task at hand, whether it’s planting, watering, or pruning. Notice the feel of the soil, the colours of the plants, and the sounds of nature around you, immersing yourself fully in the experience.
Effective: Engage in gardening with a purpose that aligns with your goals—cultivating fresh produce, beautifying your space, or simply enjoying the therapeutic benefits of connecting with nature. Use tools and techniques that enhance your gardening effectiveness, adapting your approach as needed based on the conditions of your garden.
Final Thoughts & My Insights
Understanding more about dbt mindfulness skills is at the core of getting the most out of dbt and finding more peace and tranquillity.
If you’ve been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, bipolar, or any other mental health conditions, you’ll find that learning these skills will be invaluable to you.
I’m talking from experience here.
Even if you’ve not been diagnosed, you’ll find value in restraining your judgment, taking one step at a time, and acting effectively.
We’ve discussed only half of the equation in this article. What skills go into what you can do to practice mindfulness.
Looking at things from a wise mind will also help.
FAQ
How do Mindfulness Skills Help Me?
Practicing mindfulness using DBT skills can help reduce stress, worry, anxiety and a variety of other feelings and emotions that can detract from your well-being. Mindfulness helps anchor you to the present moment so that you’re not concerned with things that happened in the past or may happen in the future.
How do the How Skills help me with mindfulness?
They help you by providing you with tools to practice mindfulness and giving you a framework around which to live your life.
